A list of things that really get on my nerves (in no particular order):
1. Hair in the sink. Why is it that hair is beautiful on a loved one's head, but if one strand leaves the bunch and is then found in another location, it's icky. Add to this my own hair strands when they flee their proper location and wrap around my arms. I'm always freaked out that it's a bug crawling on me.
2. Bugs. Especially those that attempt to crawl on me.
3. People (notably coworkers) who leave their dishes in the sink when there are TWO empty dishwashers with signs on them stating they are empty. There's also a sign about "your mother doesn't work here...clean up after yourself." Yes, we have a janitor, but he has the whole huge building to care for. His main responsibility is not getting your used coffee cup into the dishwasher.
4. Long-time married people that give me suggestions on how to meet guys:
"Have you tried church?" I've tried multiple churches.
"It's always best to get set up by friends." Done that, no success yet. Everyone left says they don't know any other singles.
"Have you tried a dating service?" Currently trying #4.
"Anyone nice at your work?" Been there, done that. Probably not going to venture there again.
"You need to get out there." And exactly where is out there?
5. Eating less and working out more and still no change on the f***ing scale.
6. People who drive slow in the left lane. The left lane is for PASSING, idiots. If several cars go around you on the right, you're probably going too slow to be in the left, otherwise known as "fast," lane.
7. Meetings during lunchtime that don't include lunch.
8. Stupid people. Now, if someone is ignorant, they can be taught. But if you're stupid, there's just not much hope for you.
9. Americans who travel abroad and expect everything to be just like America. Even the language. If you're going to be that arrogant, don't leave your little town.
10. Cigarette smoking. I don't get it. It's not cool, it makes you smell, it stains your teeth and it's the number one cause of lung cancer. And I'm allergic and asthmatic, so keep it away from me.
11. Skinny people who moan that they've gained weight. Do you want to compare saddlebags or potbellies? I win, so shut up.
8 comments:
My friends the Tud's are in Funchal. They don't speak Portuguese but they do drink the wine. Does that count?
Love this post. LOL I completely agree with #6!!!!!!
My friend complains all the time about #11...BUGS ME...cuz she's like 100 lbs...aahhhh! Anyways,love you, Em -Bevie-
I'm probably going to be hugely unpopular for saying this, but: OH MY GIDDY AUNT, I'M WITH YOU ON NUMBER 9.... And that's all I'm going to say, before I mortally insult anyone.
What a great post! I totally agree on everything, especially the part about bugs and when a long hair is on your arm, I always jump thinking it's a bug! I do think that you should add one more to your list and that's stupid men! Just a suggestion.
Did you have an extra glass of wine or did you just go ahead and write these things? So funny. Good one, Em.
Really true especially the skinny people who complain. I was one once and now...and helpful ways to meet men never work!
ROFL.
I loved #4.
One friend told me I should go clubbing. Several problems here:
1. I don't drink;
2. I can't dance; and
3. Is it just me or are most chics going to clubs these days underage??! (made me feel like a pedophile)!
Eeek!
Ryan
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