Slowing Down to Texas Pace

I think it's going to take me awhile to shake off NY...things move much slower here, which isn't all together bad, but just different.

Yesterday, I dropped off my sister Jenn and her family at the airport for their much-anticipated vacation to Chile. I was so sad to see them go, but I hope I didn't show it. I am excited for them, but it is so unnaturally quiet and lonely at their house without them.

I was thrilled that my uncle Tom and his girlfriend asked me to join them for dinner. I have seen them so rarely in the past several years, and it seemed so easy to get together for a spur-of-the-moment meal and we ended up talking for hours.

Before meeting them, I ran to the grocery store for a few things, intending on just being there a few minutes. One of the things I found frustrating in NYC was the small markets with limited items. Often, I would have to visit three different stores in various parts of the city to get all the necessary items for one of my recipes. Not so in Texas...you know how they say everything's bigger in Texas? The grocery stores are MASSIVE. There are so many items. Just looking at the milk, they must have had 20 different kinds. The choices were almost overwhelming. Although I do appreciate having the choices, it takes me longer to make a decision on the simplest things. That, and I'm not familiar with the store layout yet. :-)

Another thing to get used to: driving again. I've only driven rarely in the past three years, and it still takes all my concentration. It's no longer second-nature to me, but it's coming back quickly.

I also noticed today how courteous people are. I walked from my office over to the bank and cars that could have turned in front of me actually waited until I had passed in front of them. That wouldn't have happened in NYC! I found myself smiling, and someone I passed said Hello!

I stopped into Starbucks for an afternoon caffeine fix. The cashier forgot to call my order to the barista, so I reminded her, and she gave me a coupon for a free drink next time. They're NICE here. The whole wait time was much less than the overcrowded Starbucks near my NY office. Oh, and cheaper!

Timing

Irony: I move back to Texas in just a couple weeks, and everyone in my immediate family -- parents and both sisters + families -- will be gone from Texas.

My parents are taking off for the cooler climate in the mountains of New Mexico.
Jenn, Anthony + kids will be visiting a friend and exploring Chile.
Steph + kids will be enjoying the ocean breezes of Southern California.

Welcome home to me! :-) Guess that's what I get for moving in the heat of the summer. But in my defense, I had to go when I found someone to sublease my apt.

And focusing on the positive, at least I will have plenty of time to set up my new place, meet some new friends, and take a road trip to visit Grandma.

Running Away or Running Towards?

I haven't posted much lately, because I've been keeping quiet about something happening in my life...but I've been working on this post for over a year...

I heard Martha Beck speak at the O You Conference in San Francisco a couple years ago, and I was so impressed. I've always enjoyed her columns in the Oprah Magazine, but in person she was so much more! She's incredibly adept at making complex thinking seem attainable, and she's witty and downright funny.

One of her past columns was titled "Know When to Fold 'Em," in which she mentioned W.C. Fields's profound statement "If at first you don't succeed, try again. Then quit. No use being a damn fool about it." The column discusses how researchers have compared those who resist quitting, and of those who throw in the towel when facing unattainable goals. They found that the second group—the quitters—were healthier than their persistent peers on almost every variable.

This gives me some comfort, because I've been struggling with the idea of "quitting."

Quitting New York.

Undoubtedly, there are things I love about New York: the variety in cultures, the lack of conformity to a single (or few) ideas, the four seasons, the multitude of cultural events (especially Broadway), feeling like I'm a part of this big machine called NYC, being close to the water (even if it is the not-so-transparent Hudson River), my little close-knit church and fledgling (although now on hiatus) choir...

But...it has been a pretty lonely existence for me here. Over the last three years, I've done all the tried-and-true methods to meet friends and potential dates. I've made a few friends, but NY has a culture of everyone being so busy, you don't see them but maybe once every few months. And I miss my family, especially the kids, my nieces and nephews.

As I recently celebrated another birthday, getting closer to having to change the title of this blog and hearing the biological clock ticking louder in its finale, I realize that if I don't have kids of my own, I at least want to be closer to those I do have in my life.

I started making inquiries with my company about the possibility of transferring, and I got full approval to move ahead with the transfer to the Austin office as soon as I'm ready. The only thing sticking point is subleasing my apartment, and that has happened MUCH faster than I expected.

I'm keeping my job AND getting to live closer to my family, able to be a more consistent presence in my nieces' and nephews' lives. And it also opens up other possibilities for me, such as owning a home, eating a lot more TexMex, participating (and completing) more triathlons, and possibly having a child on my own.

I moved to NYC for my career, and I've realized my career isn't the most important thing to me. I'm moving back to have a personal life.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter.

Tri-ing Times

It was my fourth triathlon -- and Jenn's seventh -- and I'm still flying high knowing 1) I finished, and 2) I beat my last year's time by six minutes!

This first picture was taken before the race, before we got red-faced and sweaty.


After the race, proudly wearing our accomplishment medals:


And strutting our stuff:


And our post-race meal -- brunch at El Rincon:


I'm really pleased. I worked hard to improve my times on the swim and run, and I did both. My bike time was within a minute of last year's. (The bike portion is definitely my favorite, and not just because I get to eat during it.) We were very fortunate to have cloud cover for the morning, which kept away the blazing sun. It was humid, but I was thankful for the clouds.

I can't wait to do it all again next year!

Enjoying the Simple Things

I was in Austin last weekend for my niece Anna's 9th birthday. The weather was glorious. Texas is in full-spring, and the bluebonnets are just beginning to carpet the fields. Some of my favorite moments from the weekend:

• Taking Anna to get her ears pierced. She was nervous about the potential pain but so excited. Fortunately, she found the pain wasn't that bad at all, and she was THRILLED with the results. She picked out some crystal blue flowers in her birthstone as her starter set. They sparkled almost as much as she did. She told me it was the best day of her life and that she wanted to run and shout for joy. (We were in the car at the time, so that exuberance wasn't able to be expressed.) She and I were both laughing, so happy -- she was excited to have braved the experience and at the opportunity to get to wear a new form of jewelry, and I was relieved she didn't have much pain and delighted at her excitement.
• Watching a movie with my nephew Colin on my lap. This is definitely one of my favorite ways to watch movies, with a snuggly little guy. Although Colin is getting very long-legged and not so little anymore. But he was freshly showered and pajama-ed and I could snuggle into his neck and kiss his cheek. During a scary scene in the movie, he picked up my hand and put it on top of his chest.
• Bollywood dance class with Jenn. Several months ago, I saw Jenn and her friend give an impromptu performance at her house after some liquid courage, and it looked like so much fun. I was excited to be able to join her for a class, although with it being my first class and in the middle of their season, I only got about 1/3 of the moves. But it was fun and good exercise.
• Screaming as a "Mandrake" at the Harry-Potter-themed birthday party. Anna's party was all about Harry Potter, and Jenn had planned the activities around the characters and story. We made root beer floats into potions and replanted flowers pretending they were the ear-splitting mandrakes. Several of us adults screamed as the mandrakes. One of the kids said, looking at us like we were crazy, "It's not really the plants, it's just them screaming." But we were laughing, and Anna's face was beaming.
  

I am a Triathlete

This year was my third time to join my big sister Jenn on the Danskin Triathlon in Austin, TX. I knew the heat was going to kick my butt, and it did. But I was VERY pleased with my overall time.

The first year, in 2006, it took me 2 hours and 32 minutes to complete the whole thing (1/2 mile swim in open water in a lake, 12 miles biking on a very hilly course, and 3.1 miles running/walking also on a hilly course).

The second year, 2007, I shaved a little time off and completed in 2 hours and 29 minutes.

I skipped last year, due to moving to NYC and other factors. But I really missed it, and committed to doing it again this year.

And my completion time this year? 2 hours and 8 minutes! Yay! I did better in each event and was quicker on my transition times (the time between events when you change gear). The hardest time for me was on the run. It was really warm by then, and I felt like I was going to vomit the entire time. (I didn't, though.) I had to walk quite a bit, but I finished jogging. My niece Anna grabbed my hand and crossed the finish line with me.

Jenn did terrific as always, finishing in 1 hour 49 minutes.




Afterwards, we had our usual post-race brunch at a little Mexican restaurant that has delicious migas and fresh, homemade tortillas with Jenn's friend Kareen.


We've been pretty much vegetables since we finished this morning. My muscles don't hurt, but everything is very tired. Jenn and I each took a nap this afternoon, but I will be ready to go to sleep early tonight. And as sick as I felt during the run (and right after), I'm glad I did it and proud of my time. Still gotta catch Jenn, though...

It's Friday and Sunny and I'm Looking Ahead

I was supposed to have a date tonight with FWB. He called me this morning to cancel. Bummer.

But I'm so focused on next week, I'm not giving him too much thought. On Sunday, I fly to Austin to spend the week there. Fortunately, my company allows us to work from other offices, so I will meet my Austin colleagues and spend some time in their offices Monday-Wednesday. It's a great option because I'm avoiding travelling on the busiest travel days of the year AND I get to spend the evenings with my sister Jenn and her family. Plus, I don't have to take vacation days to do it.

Unlike last year, when several of my NY friends and colleagues wondered from my frequent visits to Texas if I truly lived here or there, this year I haven't been travelling home as much, mostly due to the rising costs of airfare. And of course, the NYers don't understand that Texas is a big place, and I have people to visit in Dallas, Houston, Austin and Waco. Unfortunately, the place that sees the least of me is Dallas. I have some terrific friends there, but my family is in the other cities.

And of course, when you travel, you don't want to be on the road the whole time. You want to spend quality time with people you miss and love. For Thanksgiving, I'm focused just on Austin. My parents will come in for Thanksgiving, and I'm hoping to meet up with a couple friends there for drinks or lunch. I'm also planning on packing my suitcase with all the food items I can't find up here to bring a little taste of Texas back with me.

Texas on my Mind

I'm wearing my fancy cowboy (cowgirl?) boots today. They are black with silver trim. My mom and I bought them in El Paso for me to wear to an audition for Opryland. While the audition wasn't a success, I was proud that they didn't cut me off as quickly as some of the singers and let me finish the first verse. I figured it couldn't have been too bad.

On the subway tonight, a guy got on wearing a hat with the emblem from my college alma mater, Texas A and M. (Can't find the ampersand on this stupid blackberry) I gave him the thumbs-up Gig Em sign and he asked when I graduated. Then he said something about their football team not being so great this year. I shrugged. I haven't watched a college game in years. I don't watch much football at all anymore. In Texas, football is king, and although it's annoying that so much of the school funding goes to support the football program, I have fond memories of Friday night games throughout high school and college games on Saturdays after Friday night Yell Practice. It was fun to have that school spirit and feel like a part of something bigger than myself.

Happy Anniversary to me and NYC

It was a year ago this week that I moved to The City. I have changed so much and learned so much in the past year.

When I first arrived, I was blown away by how different everyday life is here compared to that of Dallas and every other place I've lived. Suddenly, I didn't have a car, or motorcycle -- I still really miss the bike -- and yet I didn't miss driving. Okay, except when trying to haul a lot of purchased goods, such as wine, home to downtown.

No more supermarkets, either. Now I shop in little grocery stores that may or may not have all the items I'm looking for. And I buy my toiletries from a drug store. Before moving here, I would avoid buying items from a drugstore because of the ridiculously expensive prices. There even more outrageously priced here, but other than making a big excursion to Target in Brooklyn, the drugstore is the only place in Manhattan to get those items. And again, your choice is limited. (I remember going shopping with my sister Jenn in Austin and she was looking for a particular kind of personal item. She was frustrated that she couldn't find it, while I was amazed that she had a huge long aisle with multiple brands to choose from!)

My NY friends are proud of me that I'm becoming more of a NYer. I find myself frustrated with the tourists who get in my way when I'm walking quickly to work or late for church, but I'm still nice, too, and I've given many people directions, even going up and asking obviously confused tourists if they need help. My language has become more peppered with profanity, and I've learned how to bargain with street vendors and talk back to taxi drivers trying to take me out of my way for an extra buck.

I'm absolutely LOVING having four real seasons again! In Texas, spring and fall generally only last a week or two, and summer takes up 75% of the year, with numerous days over 100*F. Here, I get to enjoy the beauty of each season, and as fall is around the corner, I'm looking forward to cooler temperatures and wearing jackets again, not to mention the glorious colors as the trees turn.

I love learning about other cultures and different perspectives on life. It's been interesting to me to see the differences in my Texas friends and family and my NY friends. Take for instance my apartment. Here in NY, it is agreed that I landed a great place. My NY friends come over and say "WOW, it's so big!" My Texas friends and family make diminutive comments -- nothing deragatory,but they will say how it's small or cute or "not that big." I just smile, but when I related this to one of my NY friends, she was offended for me. I had to explain how much space I used to have in Dallas to try to give her an idea of the scale difference. Just different perspectives. It is much smaller, but I've simplified my possessions to just what I need.

When I moved here, saying goodbye to all my friends and family in Texas, I told myself I would try it for a year. I reasoned that I could do anything for a year, and I could always move back. But so much has happened in the past year...and I'm not ready to leave. I've met some wonderful new friends -- Lindsay, Rob, Erin, Liesel, Kelly -- and I've become even more independent and confident in myself. I still miss my family and friends back home, but in some ways, I cherish them more now.

And now, as I begin yet another adventure with a new job beginning on Monday, I'm hopeful and optimistic about whatever the next year brings.