Work Insanity

We just can't seem to get ahead. My company has hired a lot of people since the beginning of the year, but there is still so much more work than we have capacity for. It's very disheartening, and I'm afraid we're going to lose a lot of good people.

My friend Lisa already left. She was offered a great job with someone she had worked with in the past, and now she keeps taunting me with her very reasonable work hours.

Here's an example of how frustrating my work is right now. We have been working since January to build a site for one of our customers. It takes several months because the pharmaceutical companies have stringent legal reviews. After our client has reviewed everything, the content must be submitted to legal two weeks before the legal review meeting, then the actual review is an interminably four-hour long conference call, from which we receive extensive revisions, served with a side of sarcasm. We make the changes, and our client reviews them and probably has additional changes, which we must make before resubmitting to legal. Once legal has reviewed the content twice, we can then "tech" the site, putting the content into the design and making the pages functional. The team reviews the site on our staging server, ensuring everything has been implemented as we intended. (This full site will also have to go back through the legal review because they want to see how the content and graphics work together.) The client has just reviewed our site on the staging server and has asked for an emergency meeting this afternoon because they don't like the design. We may have to redesign the whole site. AARGH!!! Just when we thought we were close to finishing this project, we are taking a MAJOR step back.

This is only one of my projects. I'm also responsible for overseeing the content, design, information architecture and working on strategy for 4 other accounts and working on 2 business development projects. And it's not just me. Everyone seems to be overbooked and has been for the past couple months.

My counselor keeps reminding me to Breathe...I hope sighing counts!

The Dating Scene

Sorry I haven't updated in awhile...

I had a second date with Matt (the guy I met for coffee last week) on Sunday night. We went out for Indian food to one of my favorite places, Mayuri. The food was great, and we had a great conversation again. When he took me home, I was amazed to see the clock on his dash said 9:45. It had been 3 hours since he picked me up! Time flew by.

There's still not any chemistry, though. He sorta kissed me goodnight, with a peck that was similar to how my grandmother kisses me. It didn't do anything for me.

I also met a guy on Saturday night at one of my favorite clubs. His name is Bart, and we had a good time talking, too. He's not what I typically go for, but he's very nice. He did freak me out a little by saying he's really looking for a relationship, not just casual dating, and that he's determined to be married within a year. Whoa! We met for brunch on Sunday, and it was very nice.

So I had two dates on Sunday! Pretty good.

Post Weekend Report

The short version: everything was fun but nothing earth-shattering.

Friday, I had dinner with my friend Lisa and then met the guys at the local bar near my house. We played pool (I played terribly) and just hung out.

Saturday's dinner with Michael was nice. Pappa's Steakhouse is incredible. The food and wine were absolutely perfect. He let me select the wine, saying he doesn't drink much wine and doesn't know much about it. Pappa's has over 1600 bottles of wine, most priced pretty high. I was drooling over the book as I recognized several vineyards. I finally decided on a moderately priced (for Pappa's) Pine Ridge Cabernet. It was delicious, and Michael tried it and even enjoyed it, too. We had a nice conversation, and there's nothing that went wrong, but I don't feel like there's any chemistry.

On Sunday, I met Matt. He's also very nice and intelligent, and we talked for 2 1/2 hours before we realized the time. Again, it was enjoyable, but I didn't feel any sparks.

Can your "sparker" go out? Like an alternator goes out on a car? Is there any way to replace or recharge it?

Annie's Senior Prom

Here's Annie and her date, all dressed up for the prom. Annie's dress matched her eyes beautifully.

Annie and Stephen

Two dates and a get-together

I'm very happy to report that I have two scheduled dates this weekend! Plus, I met some guys that said they frequent the Cowboy Cafe, a bar that is literally two blocks from my house. They invited me to stop by for a drink tonight.

Tomorrow, my god-daughter Annie goes to her Senior Prom. I can't believe she's almost done with high school. She looks so grown up and beautiful. I promised to come see her off (they're meeting at her house at 5:00 for pictures), and then I have a dinner date with Michael from NJ.

Michael approached me as I was leaving Starbuck's one morning, asking if I was married. It really caught me off guard. I was searching for my keys in my purse and was startled when he came up to me. Anyway, he turned out to be a nice guy. We've talked several times on the phone, and he asked if I would have dinner with him the next time he was in town for business. (He is on the road most of the time, selling advertising for large sporting events.) He said he wants to take me to Pappa's -- one of the nicest steakhouses in Dallas. Yum!

Sunday afternoon I am meeting a guy I've been emailing from an online dating site for coffee. His name is Matt, and he sounds so interesting. He was born in France and lived for a few years in Switzerland. He speaks French, Italian, Japanese, and, of course, English. He owns a house in North Dallas, and we've compared notes about organic gardening. He works as a computer programmer, but actually got his master's in furniture design. He explained that while he enjoys furniture design, the profession was too isolating for his social nature. He seems to be a very balanced person, with a more worldly view than most men found in Texas. I'm looking forward to meeting him, but I'm trying not to get my hopes up too much.

Stay tuned for the post-game report!

Wanna dance?

Last Friday, I went out to a nearby bar that has a live band on the weekend. The band was terrific, and I met some interesting people.

One guy that looked ok asked me to dance. I realized rather quickly that he had already had plenty of drinks, and since the dance floor was packed, he kept holding my hands or putting them around him, holding me pretty close.

The weird thing was, everywhere I touched him, his arm, his side...he was REALLY soft. Squishy. Ew. Plus he was tall and wearing white...all I could think of was the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man from Ghostbusters! One dance was enough. I begged off another by saying how much I HAD to go to the bathroom.

3-4 inches is SIGNIFICANT, people

Since I don't have a man at home to torture with "Notice anything different?" I rely on my coworkers to notice when I change my hair.

My hairdresser was in the hospital for a couple months, so my hair has gotten REALLY long. I realize that most people don't notice the length once it's past your shoulders, unless it gets to the point where you're sitting on it. But my sisters did notice it was longer than usual.

So on Saturday, I had Daryl cut off 3-4 inches. It's still below my shoulders, but it looks so much healthier and bouncier. I enjoyed fixing it this morning, thinking about all the compliments I was sure to get at work.

I've been here for two hours....no one has said anything yet...

I'm Baaaaack

This weekend was the first weekend I was home after three weekends of travel. It felt SO good to be home! I slept late, got all my laundry done, ran all the errands I haven't had time for, scrubbed the bathroom, read a book, caught up on all my recorded TV shows...it was great.

Yesterday, I slept in until 10:30 (hoping this makes my sisters with toddlers really jealous!) and when I finally DID get up, I just moved to the couch, still in PJs, to read a book! Janet gave me this great read, The Devil Wears Prada, that was very entertaining. I started getting hungry and realized it was 2:00. Maybe I should get dressed? So I got dressed and defrosted some food that's been in my freezer for awhile and sat back down and finished the book! (I did do laundry while reading, too.)

Then I tackled the bathroom, which has been getting really gross. Now that it's clean, I'll admit that I haven't cleaned my shower since I broke up with Rod and had to fire his mom as my maid. (That was last June.) Pretty disgusting, I know. So it took a bit of scrubbing to get the soap scum off. I don't know why, but I had the song from Cinderella stuck in my head while cleaning the bathroom. "Cinderella! Cinderella! Night and day it's Cinderella!"

Then I cleaned out the freezer and fridge. In the freezer, I had two gallon ziplock bags of ice left over from the last party I threw. (When was that? Maybe August?) I decided I could get rid of this. If and when I have another party, ice is cheap, maybe $1 a bag? This leftover ice has taken up most of two shelves in my freezer for too long.

Last, I decided to actually cook. I haven't cooked in about three weeks, either. So I pulled out my recipe book to get ideas and make a grocery list. There are so many recipes in there that I've never made. I guess they looked good to me when I read them, so I clipped them out and stuck them in there. I decided on a chicken & rice dish, spinach quiche and a Cosmopolitan. For inspiration.

Now all my clothes are clean, I have fresh food in my fridge, and I'm ready for the week.

Battling the Bulge

I haven't posted in awhile... I've been really down and frustrated about my lack of weight loss. I had my annual check-up with my doc in December, and my weight was the highest ever. (Higher than my previous highest ever, which was so fortunately captured forever in my younger sister's wedding pictures.) My doc very tactfully said that although my BMI (body mass index: height & weight) isn't at the level where they consider it to cause health problems, I probably should lose a little. I told her I'm not happy with my weight and already had a plan to change it.

And so, I started cutting back on food intake and joined the gym. I've been diligently working out 4-5 times a week, a combination of aerobic and weight-lifting. I've never been much of an exerciser, and I really have stuck with it this time. I don't have a scale at my house, so I weigh myself at the gym once a week. I also planned on being able to notice the weight loss by how my clothes fit.

Only, there's been NO CHANGE. I'm so frustrated. My doctor and the trainer at the gym assume I'm eating on the sly, secretly consuming high calories in forbidden foods. Everyone has a suggestion, and I feel like no one believes me that I am doing the right things! I don't eat fried food, desserts, white flour items. I've cut way back on alcohol intake. I eat more fruits and vegetables, and my carbs are high fiber, whole wheat. I don't drink soda. I drink plenty of water. I only have one coffee a day, and only M-F.

My counselor suggested I try to focus on what I am thankful for regarding my body instead of bombarding it with negative criticism. Her suggestion reminded me of a woman I saw when I was in NY. While I was waiting for some friends outside a restaurant, a woman came shuffling by on her way to the grocery store. She was bent over at a 90* angle at the waist. Her legs were pretty deformed, too, and she didn't bend her knees but swung her legs from the hip. Her feet were angled in odd directions, too. Her shuffle was obviously hard won, and I thought how most people must see her with pity while she was probably proud of her accomplishment. And how fortunate I am to be able to walk with ease.

Having kids of your own vs. enjoying others

Today I was a guest at my niece's 4-yr-old princess birthday party. It was very fun and chaotic, with lots of little girls dressed in their finest princess clothes.

I enjoyed talking to some of the parents. But I was surprised that one mom, after commenting on how nice it was that I'm involved in my nieces' and nephews' lives, asked me, "So when are you going to have kids?"

I paused for a minute and looked at her, thinking, are you serious? can't you see I'm here alone?

I just told her I'm still looking for the perfect sperm donor.

She thought I meant actually going to a sperm bank. I explained that I've been married before and I'm not so sure I want to be married again.

It's interesting how people feel like they can comment on your life. I know couples who have been married for many years, and they complain that everyone asks them when they're going to have kids. One couple I know don't want to have kids, but they don't feel they should have to explain themselves to acquaintances or perfect strangers, either.

I'm kinda enjoying my singlehood. It's fun to visit the kids here in Austin or in Houston, but it's also nice to go back to my quiet, orderly house and veg out in front of the tv with a nice glass of wine.

I also got to see the twins again at the party. Paige remembered me from last weekend. Most people would think, of course, but usually both Paige and Graham take a while to warm up to you. Paige actually reached for me a couple times at the party, and I got some great snuggles from her tonight. She's a sweetheart. I love all the hugs & kisses from these sweet little ones. Lack of affection is one of the few complaints I have about living alone. But my heart is full tonight.