Sunday, January 11, 2009

Learning the Hard Way

Life is all about making mistakes, right? And hopefully learning from them.

I have made plenty in my life, and some I've had to make more than once before learning the lesson. Unfortunately, those learnings don't prevent one from making brand new mistakes.

I'm horribly embarrassed to admit that I f***ed things up with FWB. Just when it was all going so well...

On New Year's Eve, by the end of the evening, I had had several drinks. I wasn't so drunk that I got sick, but apparently I said some things that were to be kept in confidence to one of FWB's friends. FWB is furious and completely [and justifiably] disappointed with me. I don't remember the conversation, but no matter -- the damage is done.

And I have no one but myself to blame.

10 comments:

jman said...

So what lesson is it you have learned? Not to betray confidences? I think you already knew that. Not to drink too much? I think you knew that already too. I don't know what confidence you betrayed and how FWB discovered this, but hopefully his anger and disappointment will lessen with time. If not, there is nothing you can do except perhaps try to understand why you did what you did.

get2eric said...

Wait a minute...........Don't be picking up all the guilt here.

jman's right. You are no dummy. You know what's best not said. There is more here than you have reported.....??

Anonymous said...

What, What, What!!!!

FWB is staking all on one night's comments after all the good times?!?!? Not such a friend w or w/ob in my opinion. Please don't beat yourself up on this one, my dear Emily - you were in a comfort zone and let your guard down a little??? and you were human??? Life is about risk and trust ... for all involved ...

Irish Parisienne said...

oh shite.. as they would say in Dublin town :(

You have to just ride this one out.. make sure he knows you are sorry (which Im sure he does already) and then just sit it out. Wait for him to come back to you. If he does great... if he doesnt you KNOW you are better off..

In the meantime make yourself REALLY busy...

And don't be feeling bad.. yeah sure you messed up a bit... but no one died... its just a silly mistake..

Bonne courage :)

Anonymous said...

Well you know me,Em, say it as it is..anyone would be upset at a confidence betrayed so we cannot 'call him' for that..all your Friends and Posters on your Blog know that you are a decent Human Being and a nice Person so surely by now HE should have realised that you are not a nasty lady and he should do the right thing and take it in his stride if he cares about you, Aunty Norma.xx

paula said...

Oh for goodness sake, everyone makes mistakes from time to time, if he is willing to throw it all away for one silly drunken error then he needs to get a grip! XX

Anonymous said...

Seriously, Emily, if he is willing to throw it all away over a slip of the tongue then he really wasn't in it for the long term. Mature adults work through problems like this and come out better and stronger on the other side. Lessons learned, apologies accepted and on we go. If he's not one to forgive the small things, he surely won't be one to stick with you through the big things. Perhaps the lesson learned is that he still has lots of heavy baggage he's dealing with and you deserve someone more stable.

get2eric said...

Oh, I really like that last comment. Who is that?

jman said...

Without knowing the nature of the confidence betrayed (and I am not asking), it is impossible to know whether the magnitude of his anger is justified. What you did doesn't make you a bad person, but on the other hand he might be re-examining things vis-a-vis you (eg if I can't trust her to keep a confidence what else can't I trust her not to do) just as many of the posters are dismissing him if he can't get past it. You and he will either work it out or you won't. Hopefully you didn't out the fact that he voted for Obama and he works for the Republican National Committee or something equally as dire and it all works out in the end.

Anonymous said...

Em. will you forgive me for using your Blog to ask our Paula if she is receiving my e mails? I keep checking her Blog but not written anything on it since September 2008
Thank-you,Emily,..xx A.Norma.