Friday nights always seem to be the worst when I'm lonely. I guess I equate Friday nights with "date night," and it just seems pathetic to spend it on my couch with my cat and a half-bottle of wine.
And I know I'm thinking too much when I start to read stuff into stupid commercials, but... I just saw one for a jeweler in preparation for Valentine's Day (which I'm SO looking forward to) which stated something about "if your heart is open, love will always come in."
Well, what if your heart is open, and all that happens is that love flows out? I'm feeling a bit unbalanced in the heart department.
Remember that book about Love Languages? My primary love language is touch. I start to feel extreme loneliness when I go days without feeling human touch. I think that's why I've been getting so many massages lately, in addition to the reason that my neck and shoulders have been killing me. Even though I have to pay for it, as least it's human contact. Although it doesn't quite fit the bill -- it's not like bumping into people in the subway or shaking peoples' hands in business fill the void -- but it's as close as I have, now.
The crappy thing is...FWB was my best friend here, as well as my "boyfriend." Now I'm back to square one. (And I'm not going to call him. I'm not even tempted. I'm just sad, grieving the loss of my friend.)
7 comments:
Sorry to read you are feeling low. VD is a marketing device whose side effect makes single people feel bad. If it helps, consider that at least you are feeling lonely for the right reasons; imagine being with someone and feeling lonely! Somewhere out there is the receptor for your message of "let my love open the door to your heart".
Ach, we wish you were here this weekend. Lots of love is flowing your way long distance. Feel free to come anytime you see a flight sale. (or not)
Feel better Emily!
ooh, wish I could love on ya right now. We are watching South Pacific right now because we're all addicted. G wanted to see it all, and Paige can sing all the songs. Ev is dancing.
Valentines is so commercial and overrated. full stop.
Sending you big hugs and lots of love ..... XXXX
..FEEL MY LOVE,EMILY!! I am on your right shoulder now..can you feel my fingers ever so lightly ?
...the Magic should be working in about half an hour..ok? (Pay me later) xxxx
....that was me,Emily and I forgot to 'sign off'
Aunty Norma. Did you think it was a crazy woman? hahahaha
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