Why do we revisit or reconsider relationships from our past? I think sometimes the good memories stay with you more than the bad. And sometimes, especially during times of loneliness, you wonder if there is something worth salvaging. Or maybe it was the right person but the timing just wasn't right. Perhaps you didn't give the relationship a fair shot the first time around. And for me, I worry that I may throw in the towel too easily, run when things get tough, so I try again to make sure I'm not just avoiding conflict.
But I also tend to put more stock in my mind than my emotions. I trust thinking more than feeling. I understand (in theory) the importance of paying attention to those gut reactions, but I generally overthink things, rationalizing and reasoning away those pesky feelings.
I have another single friend (male) who told me you know, deep inside yourself, when something is right or not. I argued (of course), but what if I really don't know?
Or maybe it's just hard to shut the door on a relationship because in some way, it feels like admitting failure. Another one bites the dust. And it's always difficult to say goodbye.
4 comments:
I wrote a lengthy comment but it doesn't seem to show up. Now I can't remember it and the meaning of life, which in a blinding flash of insight I revealed, is once again lost. Oh well.
A brief synopsis of what else I said, it is nostalgia fostered by loneliness and melancholy which gives rise to reveries of old relationships. The heart may want what the heart wants, but the head is the true reality check. It is always right and emotions are where hope goes to hide. And while hope is a powerful force in some circumstances, in ones such as this it is a drag on being open to the new .
I heard a comedian on tv recently say that the reason we look back fondly on bad relationships is because we take pictures only during the happy times. When the realtionship ends and we have a sentimental moment, we get those photos out and look back longingly. He said we should remember to take a few pictures in the middle of a fight. Later we can look at those pics and remind ourselves, "wow, he/she sure was a crazy #&%@!" haha--he may have something there.
jman: True, but I believe it's a balance of head and heart that gets you to the right decision.
Anonymous: HA! Good advice!
I always,always follow my Heart so that if anything DOES go awry then I can honestly say I did my best..but if I follow my Head..then I have judged wrongly.I can also live with myself knowing that I did the honest thing..I'm also lucky enough to have a '6th sense' nerve going up my back and I am led by that too :) a kinda prickly feeling. :)
A.Norma.xx (Em do you know my Grandkids call me Nutty Norma! ) I wonder why? :)
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