It's all Relative

Brooks Reunion-Apr06 035
Originally uploaded by Gem-Em.

This weekend, I joined the rest of my family for a reunion in Waco, TX. This was my mother's side of the family. It was a lovely weekend for it: warm enough for the kids to swim in my uncle Joe's pool, but not so hot that it was sweltering.

The youngest are Paige and Graham at 2 years and 10 months; the oldest is Sudie at 91. The rest of us are in the middle.

Feeding Frenzy

Originally uploaded by monnarchj.

I found this photo entitled "Dinnertime" on Flickr.com. Oh my! I was so impressed with my sisters when they breastfed, especially Steph having the twins. It's such a commitment. But look at this poor feline mama! The expression on her face says it all.

Don't You Hate it When...

...at the end of the day, you look in the mirror and see you have food in your teeth and you haven't eaten since lunch.

...you sit down to a business meeting, cross your legs and notice your zipper is down. Then you try to figure out a way to subtlely zip it up without anyone noticing.

...you spend extra time on your hair to make it look nice and the humidity outside makes it all fall anyway.

...it rains in Dallas and all the traffic lights don't work. (It's just rain -- Portland and Seattle must know something we don't.) And don't even get me started on the drivers.

...your fat jeans become your everyday jeans.

Others?

A Fresh Start

I needed a new blog template. What do you think? (I think my sister Jenn will like that I picked a green one!)

I've been making quite a few changes in my life lately. After a grueling 9 months, I finally got relieved of my duties on a particular project at work. I'm now actually enjoying my work again and my coworkers have noted that I'm smiling more!

I also changed hairdressers. After going to the same guy for 10 years, I decided to make a change after he stood me up and wasn't truly apologetic. It's tough, because I know he needs the work, but as a paying customer, I deserve better.

I'm moving soon. More on that later.

I'm thinking about changing massage therapists, too. Similar to the hairdresser, I've been seeing my masseuse for 11 years. I've referred several friends to her and often given her gift certificates to other friends. For the past couple years, I've been seeing her once a month or so, but lately it seems she's more aggressive about me coming in or buying various products. It seems it's all about the money.

I realize this is her business, but when I originally met her, I felt she was a very soulful person. Maybe it's because massage is a personal service -- someone is rubbing your body -- but I need to feel safe. Feeling pressured to buy! buy! buy! doesn't help me relax.

Plus, I found a new masseuse! She's closer to me, cheaper and stronger. It's just hard trying to figure out what to say to the one I've been seeing. Breaking up is never easy!

A Happy Easter Weekend

Happy Easter! 

Steve and I visited Steph, Al, Paige & Graham for Easter weekend. We had a ball Easter egg hunting, swimming, lots of great food and lots of giggles.


Hello, Easter Bunny 

On Easter morning, Graham got creative with his loot. We were all tickled.


StickerMan 

Unfortunately, he had to take them off before church. He protested, "No...I want to be funny!"

The Wrath of God

Last night I had dinner with my gay-boyfriend Daniel. It's his birthday today, and he's 22! So much of life ahead of him. He's such a sweetheart and a really great friend.

He's been struggling with his religion (Christianity) and his sexuality. He has been going to a church regularly and finally talked to the pastor. This pastor actually told him if he continues to lead a gay lifestyle, he will get AIDS as his punishment from God.

I wholeheartedly, vehemently disagree with this! And how awful that this minister is spreading this nonsense!

According to this theory, you could say that people who get cancer are being punished for some sin. Even children get cancer. Guess they should have been better behaved.

What about the Christian idea that we are ALL sinners? I guess everyone of us is just a moment away from a deadly disease. I know I've made some huge mistakes in my life. What does that deserve?

Ready to Run

The gauntlet has been thrown down. The date has been set. Now I just have to get my butt in shape!

My sister Jennifer has challenged me to join her in participating in the Danskin Women's Triathlon in June. After last year's adventure races, this is taking it to the next level. I've never done a triathlon, but completing the adventure races last year gave me some confidence.

My biggest weakness is running, followed by biking. I'm not concerned about the swimming, which is only 1/2 mile. The run is 3.1 mile (5K), and the bike portion is 12 miles in the hilly roads around Austin. BIG hills. [gulp!]

I took Jenn's advice and rode my bike down to a local middle school where they have a nice track. I turned on my iPod as I started to jog, deciding on Dixie Chicks. The first song up was "Ready to Run." I chuckled to myself, how appropriate!

I jogged one lap, then walked 1/2 and jogged 1/2 for two laps. By then, I was toast. But I still had to ride home.

I took a route that included a fairly good hill. At least biking and jogging use slightly different muscles!

By the time I got home, my face was so red, it bordered on purple. Exercise is definitely not good for my rosacea. But the rest of me felt pretty good.

Remember how fun it was to be a kid?

When we were in Austin for Anna's birthday weekend, Steve, Jenn and I took the kids to the park. We had fun, although it was steamy hot.


Anna looks delighted 


Colin, with Henley waiting her turn behind. 


I took a turn on the slide with Anna 


It looked like so much fun, Steve had to try it too! 


Helping the little monkeys climb 


Jenn gives Colin a boost 

Yee-Haw!

A good time was had by all at Anna's 5th birthday celebration for Cowboys and Cowgirls. I put on my "yee-haw doo-dah" clothes, and Steve and I helped with the pony rides.


Anna and me at the Cowboy/Cowgirl party 

Steve meeting my folks seemed to go well, too, although I wasn't too worried. He's such a great guy.

Here, Steve holds Lyra's hands on the horn of the saddle as they walk along. 

Flipping the Switch

Last weekend, as I was cleaning out and organizing my closets, I found a picture that was taken of me about 3 years ago. I was skinny! It really made an impression on me, and I decided right then and there that I have to commit to eating more healthy and smaller portions and get this extra weight off for good.

A friend of mine calls it "flipping the switch." She is battling her own weight issue and has, as many women do, gone up and down the scale. But she told me once you truly decide, it's like flipping a switch inside your head. Basically, you make it a priority, and it therefore outweighs any silly urges.

I was doing really well until this trip. After that nice steak dinner and a dessert, which I rarely if ever allow myself, we ate dinner with our client last night and had rich, creamy pasta at a local Italian restaurant.

I guess my switch got temporarily switched off. I'm resetting it at the breaker now.

Travelling Again

Today I'm in Indianapolis. My coworkers and I arrived yesterday evening, in time for a nice dinner at Ruth's Chris Steak House and several hours for reviewing our presentation for today. I've never eaten at a Ruth's. It was delicious. I had a petite filet, and we split potatoes au gratin and sauteed spinach. Oh, and there was dessert. I had an upsidedown chocolate souffle. Mmm.

We're staying at the Westin, which is one of my favorites. They boast the "Heavenly Bed" and the "Heavenly Bath." I'm sitting here blogging in the Heavenly Robe. I feel so ethereal.

I'll be home again late Thursday, and Saturday, Steve and I will drive down to Austin for my niece Anna's 5th birthday celebration. I can't believe she's FIVE! (Today, actually.) In addition to all the excitement and activity for Anna, Steve will get to meet my sister, bro-in-law and parents for the first time.

Yard Exercise

My favorite kind of exercise is the kind that doesn't seem like exercise, like gardening. And then afterwards, you sit down and feel your muscles go "Ahhh..."

This was the first weekend in four weeks that I've been home. My house definitely needed some attention. Also, my digital video recorder was full of all my favorite shows. One I like to watch on the weekends is "Gardening by the Yard" with Paul James. My brother-in-law Anthony got me hooked on it. James is quirky and goofy, but it helps you remember things. Yesterday I watched three in a row! It must have inspired me, because today I tackled the backyard.

It's amazing what a little mulch does. It really makes the areas around the trees look neater. And I found some large rocks in the back corner of the yard that I used to border the patio and garden. I think it turned out pretty nice.

My garden. See my new yellow Callalilly in the background? 

My new bushes 

Almost a Nice Weekend

Last weekend, Steve and I visited some friends of his in Los Angeles. They actually live in Huntington Beach. After a long flight and a delay with the rental car company, we were VERY hungry. We then got to experience LA traffic firsthand and went an average of 20 miles an hour. Then, unfortunately, the directions the friends gave us had one little mistake...it said to turn left instead of right on the road we exited. Oops...twenty miles later...

Their house was nice, (he's a builder), and has several nice features. However, they also have three very smelly labrador retrievers. I like dogs. I'm slightly allergic to them, but it's not something I mention to dog owners. It just means I have to blow my nose more frequently, and I'm very careful to wash my hands after petting them. These dogs were sweet, if a little hyper. They jumped on us. Every day. So much for the nice clothes we packed.

Their dogs mostly live in the kennel in the backyard, but they let them in every evening. Everything smelled like dog. They are allowed on all the furniture, people and beds. And there was a layer of dog hair and dust on everything.

Our bed was an inflatable mattress with a built-in pump. And a slow leak. Steve woke up at least 6 times to fill it back up. I would hear the hum of the pump and slowly feel the bed rise underneath me.

Saturday morning we had a very nice brunch on the patio. I really liked the landscaping and tile, the koi pond and umbrellas. But I could have done without the strong smell of dog poop while we ate.

Am I getting too picky? I sound like an ungrateful guest. We were both sick of travelling by the time we got there, and I guess I was just yearning for my clean house.

But did I mention the towels had stains...?

picturesque Hanauma Bay 

Having a nice dinner overlooking Waikiki 

Dolphin Encounter

I did make it back home. For a time, anyway. I just didn’t have a spare moment to blog about the rest of my trip to Hawaii. In fact, I’m writing this from Pittsburgh.

We arrived back in Dallas, did several loads of laundry, got slammed at work with hundreds of emails and questions, and I learned I was travelling to Pittsburgh for the end of the week. From here, Steve and I will be going to Los Angeles to visit with some friends of his. (I used my accumulated frequent flier miles to go to Hawaii, so I’m trying to replenish my account.)

Steve and I agreed the best part of the trip was our underwater experiences. In addition to snorkeling in Hanauma Bay, we went snorkeling with dolphins. We made reservations with the excursion company for Thursday, and I was disheartened that the weather was at its worst during our visit that morning. Still, the money was already spent, and there was no option to reschedule, so off we went.

The boat took us to a cove off-shore that was frequently visited by local Spinner dolphins, so called for their propensity to leap out of the water and spin. We got into the water in groups of five. The shock of the water and the adrenalin made me catch my breath, and I was comforted that Steve grabbed my hand as we swam together towards the pod of dolphins.

We saw them, briefly, but they swam on and avoided the strange creatures floating at the surface gaping at them. Steve and I were both silently concerned that might be the extent of our interaction, but fortunately, our excursion team knew about another cove.

This second stop had a pod of 40-50 dolphins that swam in circles all around us. They come up for air every 7 minutes or so, and you could hear their communication of squeaks and clicks even before you saw them. It was a magical experience.

Steve busily snapped pictures on the disposable underwater camera we brought. Disappointingly, the film quality wasn't the best, so the pictures don't give the right impression. The water was clear and the dolphins were, at their closest, only 10 feet away from us. 

Chinatown

Oh, how quaint! Honolulu has its own Chinatown! (I thought.)

I've been to New York's and San Francisco's Chinatowns, and it's some of the best Chinese food I've ever eaten. So I encouraged Steve to go with me to Honolulu's for a late lunch after we had snorkeled at Hanauma Bay.

By the time we got there, (let's just say we didn't take the most direct route) we both had to go to the bathroom and we were VERY hungry. Many establishments here have signs stating "No public bathrooms," but we thought we could find a restaurant and use theirs. Unfortunately, the first three eateries we stopped at didn't take credit cards. We intentionally didn't bring much cash with us that day since we were going to the beach. We decided our bladders were more important than our stomachs, and set off to just find a public bathroom. We found one, but it was locked! (I'm dancing at this point, and looking with interest at the trees and bushes nearby.) Steve spotted a security guard and asked him where we could find a bathroom. He said they're locked (no, really?) and the merchants must let you in. I think I rolled my eyes (still dancing, too), and Steve mentioned we REALLY had to go. The guy had pity on us and unlocked the doors for us.

Now, wouldn't you know, there's a LINE in the women's bathroom! I'm third back. There are two stalls in there, but someone stayed in one of them the whole time, flushing often. So that left the one for the other three of us.

I'm sure I was turning yellow. Steve got a glimpse of me waiting when someone left the bathroom, and his look of astonishment and sympathy was so sweet!

After we took care of that, we again looked for a restaurant that took credit cards. We found a nice looking one called "Good Luck." We were served complimentary hot tea and seated at a nice, clean table. The place had one of those menus that doesn't give the ingredients of the various dishes, just the names. So, you kinda have to guess what you're getting. I decided on a chicken in black bean sauce (something I've had before at Chinese restaurants in Dallas), and Steve got duck.

Now, I realize why they named it "Good Luck."

Good luck finding something you'll like!

Mine was sinewy pieces of chicken that almost didn't seem cooked enough, with large pieces of uncooked onion and bell pepper. I'm allergic to bell pepper, and raw onions upset my stomach. So basically, I feasted on the rice.

Steve didn't fare much better. The duck was EXTREMELY fatty, and he kept exclaiming, "oh, gross! Look at this!" After four or five times, I politely told him I really didn't want to look anymore. It was disgusting.

Needless to say, we decided not to return to Chinatown for any other meals.

Aloha from paradise

Just logging in for a post from the island of Oahu in Hawaii!

Steve and I arrived to a soft but steady rain on Friday. I guess it must have been a slow news day stateside, because both my mom and my friend who is checking on my cat Sabrina mentioned the flooding in Oahu. It happened a couple days before we arrived, and was only in a small section on the West side. (We are staying on the south beach, Waikiki) Anyway, no worries! And by Saturday, we had seen 3 rainbows.

By today, we finally feel adjusted to the time change. We have been going to bed earlier and getting up earlier than we do back home, but it's nice because we have breakfast on our patio and watch the sun come up.

We went snorkeling in Hanauma Bay on Saturday and again yesterday afternoon after Steve finished his work. On our first excursion, we saw at least 20 different fish and an octopus. The octopus was blinking his eye at us, and we enjoyed watching him until he squeezed himself into a crack in the coral and shut his eye. We would have missed him like that. It's incredible how much he blended in to his environment.

Yesterday, we went into a different part of the bay, and again saw many fish. My favorite was a new one (not one we had previously seen) who was also hidden among the coral. I also enjoyed watching a little fish pop his head in and out from his hidden spot in the coral. I kept thinking about Finding Nemo and giving each fish different characteristics in my mind.

Our biggest joy was seeing a sea turtle. Wow. How majestic and graceful. It was truly awesome.

Honolulu is as expensive as I remembered. Our first meal (on Friday) consisted of two cheeseburgers, an appetizer and 1 beer. $40! Being a Downward, I know how to be thrifty, though. We have cereal and fruit in our condo each morning, and I've bought sandwich makings for some lunches. We also brought a bottle of wine with us to have before we go out in the evenings.

We've also enjoyed searching out the local restaurants that are off the beaten path. Last night, we found a sushi place that was CHEAP and really good. We ate like kings, and spent less than we did on those just-satisfactory cheeseburgers. The Ahi tuna here is so fresh, it melts like butter in your mouth!

Today is my second day on my own, as Steve is actually here for work. Yesterday I rented an umbrella and read a whole book cover to cover, listening to the waves. I've been very careful with my pale white skin, slathering on the sunscreen multiple times a day and hiding beneath a wide-brimmed hat and sunglasses, but alas, my foot must have been sticking out from the umbrella and got burned! It's just the left one. I'm wearing sneakers today and will likely spend most of my day perusing the shops. Gotta give my skin a break from this intense sun.

The internet cafe I'm in is also quite costly, but I have lots to write about so I'll probably post again soon. Miss you all!

The Big Green Egg

Steve cooked for me last weekend! He made me the best ribs I've ever eaten. They were tender, spicy and just finger-lickin' delicious!

He grilled/smoked them in his Big Green Egg, a ceramic smoker/grill/barbecue. He swears by it, and says since he bought it several years ago, he'll never go back to a regular grill.

I made potato salad and beans to go with the ribs. I had to call my Dad, chef extraordinaire, to remind me what all goes in potato salad. He chuckled at me, but I just haven't made it very many times in my life. Potato salad seems like one of those recipes that everyone does a little differently. I used potatoes (of course), low-fat mayo, a little Dijon mustard, salt & pepper, celery and a little juice from the banana pepper jar. (Daddy suggested sweet pickle juice or pineapple, but I didn't have either so I improvised.) It turned out good, but those ribs were the absolute highlight of the meal!

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall...

When you stop to think about it, it's pretty crazy all the things we women do to make our selves "presentable." Shaving, waxing, plucking, exfoliating, moisturizing...sometimes I wonder about all the time and money spent on these activities.

I feel very fortunate that the older generation on both sides of my family have aged so well. Good genes! It gives me some consolation about my changing (aging) body and skin.

I guess not everyone is so lucky. And I probably shouldn't be so judgemental, but...

I saw a woman in a restaurant the other day who had obviously given up shaping her eyebrows with tweezers or wax...she had totally removed them! But what's worse is that she DREW them back with a black pencil at least 2 inches above where her eyebrows should be. Oh, and did I mention she had lovely gray hair? The black wasn't exactly subtle. To top off the effect, one of the created eyebrows had more of an arch than the other, giving her a permanently questioning look.

She MUST have used a mirror to do this. I guess she couldn't take in the whole effect. How often do we really see what's reflected to us? Are we just seeing what we're expecting to see?

Meeting the Family

Meeting someone's family is always an important step in a new relationship. I believe this is even trickier when meeting someone's children.

Steve's son, Declan, came to visit his dad this weekend. Friday night did not go so well, but in all fairness, it could have been worse. It definitely didn't go as easily as my fantasy of meeting him and his sister Hayden and all of us having a laughing good time.

Declan is ten years old. I am the first girlfriend of his dad's that he's ever met. The last time he saw his dad was at New Year's, and he was understandably jealous of sharing any time of his father's with a stranger.

After dinner on Friday, Steve talked to Declan about his relationship with me, explaining that I'm an important, happy part of his life now. After that, things went a lot smoother. On Saturday, they played all day while I did my own thing (errands, cleaning, exercising, etc.) and then we got together for dinner. We had a good time and came back to my house to play Chickenfoot (a dominoes game). Declan was a natural and ended up winning the game. Oh, and he asked his dad if he could ride in my car from the restaurant to my house. :-)

Tonight I had them over to my house for dinner, and then we played Scattegories. I think it was a little too sophisticated for Declan, but he seemed to enjoy himself anyway. He was very interested in my iPod and asked lots of questions about how it works.

I've never dated someone with kids before, and it's more difficult than I had imagined. I'm embarrassed to admit that I miss our alone time and the easy routine of weekends we have fallen into. Still, I'm up for the challenge. I've never known or loved anyone as special as Steve, so if anyone is worth it, he is.

Steve and his son, Declan 

Valentine's Recap

I almost felt guilty about my Valentine's Day this year. It was so great! I felt I was betraying the single women everywhere, like my friend Hannah, who wrote about what a silly frivolous holiday it is.

I was VERY spoiled on Valentine's Day, and I must admit, it's really nice to be spoiled!

Steve sent me TWO bouquets of flowers to work: one a mixed bouquet and one with a dozen roses. My parents sent a box of goodies from the El Paso Chile Company, and my company gave each employee a rose and an iPod shuffle to share with our loved ones. (Steve was really thrilled with his.)

We went to dinner at a nice restaurant in town, Maguire's. We each had steak and then shared an incredible dessert, the chocolate lava cake. Mmmm...

Steve also bought me gifts, some accessories for my camera that he bought me for Christmas. I got him a framed picture of the two of us to put in his office or home. It was just a wonderful day.

Bouquet #1 

Bouquet #2 

My Fix-It Guy

We've had a record warm winter, but I still don't know if I'd consider swimming. A few weekends ago, Scuba Steve braved the cold waters of his pool to find the elusive leak that is continuously draining his water. My job was to watch and make sure he didn't drown or go into hypothermic shock. Luckily for me, he didn't. Unluckily, he didn't find the leak either. It was worth a shot, though. Renting the scuba suit and getting the bulb syringe and food coloring to squirt at the cracks only cost $25. It cost several hundred to have the pool professionals come out to locate it, but now that they have, he's going to fix it himself. I'm so impressed with his ingenuity!

Scuba Steve, ready to take on the frigid waters of his pool. 

Working to Make it Better

To update my blog audience on the my job satisfaction, I've recently been trying new approaches and feeling much better about things. I've been delegating more, pushing back when people are trying to take advantage of my kindness, and I'm getting involved in the company's plans to make this a better place to work. I feel much more in control. While things are still hectic, I feel like I'm being more productive and solution-oriented.

Just venting

Sorry I haven't posted in awhile. Work has been INSANE. It's so busy, and I'm literally exhausted when I do get outta here. And now I'm getting a cold. I know the stress has lowered my defenses.

I try not to write about work too much. It's somewhat dangerous and not that interesting. But I need to vent.

I got pulled from the new project that launches in London. I'm very bummed about that.

My major account has continued to be a major pain in the rear. It's a huge account for the company, so there's lots of visibility. But it's not well organized and there's too many new people on the account. I don't mind training someone, but this is ridiculous! I've been here for almost 6 years, but four others on the team are brand new to the company, three of these are not in my department. I'm constantly being asked questions about how they should do their jobs and pulled into different directions. Plus I'm trying to actually do my work. Although I'm supposed to be 100% dedicated to this project, I still have 3 other accounts I'm also responsible for. We just don't have anyone to transfer them off to.

I continue to count the weeks to go until Hawaii. My saving grace is Steve. He makes me smile and forget about work.

Travel

Steve's been travelling this week for work. I really miss him! Even though we don't see each other every day, it's nice to know he's just a few minutes away if I needed him. But since Monday, he's been out in California, calling to tell me how beautiful the ocean and the weather have been.

I think it's easier when I'm the one travelling. I think it's harder on the one who gets left behind.

Both our jobs are going to require a lot of travel in the next few months, so we are planning to use the frequent flier miles to our advantage. I'm going to Pittsburgh next week, and my name has been tossed around to work on a new account that kicks off in London in two weeks! Steve is off to San Antonio next week, then Seattle and California again soon.

And then he has a business trip to Hawaii that he wants me to join him on! It's prime season for Hawaii, but with my miles, it's only going to cost me $10 to fly there. We're staying for a week, and he only has to work 3 of those days. I can't wait. I'm counting the weeks (5 to go).

Crash

The weekend started out good. I got a good workout in on Friday night before meeting Steve for dinner. I did cardio and weights, and really pushed it on the machine that works the lats, the triangular shaped muscle in the back over the shoulder blade.

On Saturday, Steve and I met his friend Cris for mountain biking on a trail that the guys have done before. It's 5 miles out and 5 miles back and would definitely be classified as intermediate. The beginning was the toughest, with lots of challenging hills and dips. My asthma started acting up, and I was very frustrated that I couldn't catch my breath. I haven't had that happen since last July, and unfortunately, the inhaler I brought with me was expired.

We got almost to the end of the 5 mile trail when I needed a break. I rested and stretched while the guys went on ahead, promising to return in about 7 minutes. It was a lot longer than 7 minutes, but I was enjoying the view from the top of the hill. Steve came back with blood running down his calf. He had crashed, and his bike had dug into his leg, tearing a nasty gash in it. I cleaned it up with bottled water and tissues as best I could, and we headed back.

We had just gotten to the tough hills and dips when I realized my muscles were really tired. My legs were shaking with the effort, but I was determined to finish. The guys went down a steep hill and up the other side. I was going to walk it like I had done on the way out, but it looked like so much fun, I decided to try it.

I was using my rear brake as I'm supposed to, but I was still gaining too much speed. Then my bike hit either gravel or a protruding vine, and I went sailing over the top of the handlebars. I landed HARD on my left shoulder and left hip, my face pointed down into the ground. I learned you can really drag out Steve's name:
"Steeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeve!"

He was already running down the hill towards me. He untangled my right foot from my bike and helped gently turn me over. I really thought I might have broken my left upper arm (humerus), but I was able to move it. He said his first thoughts were how they were going to get me out of there, and he started thinking about calling a Medivac helicopter.

Fortunately, it wasn't that bad. I was able to walk out. I'm covered in bruises and scrapes and even have a slight black eye, but everything's still working. Steve had to get antibiotics and a tetanus shot for his injury, and we both took lots of ibuprofen the rest of the weekend. But all's well that ends well. I think our original plan of going to Houston for the weekend would have been less painful, though.

Today is Wednesday...

I've been entertaining clients for the past two days and nights. Not too long ago, I welcomed these evening excursions as a nice distraction from the monotony of living alone. Now, however, I can actually say I'd rather spend my evenings focusing on my personal life. I consider this quite an achievement of sorts. Last year, my New Year's resolution was to create a personal life, since I had so thrown myself into work and my career so completely the year before and decimated what personal life I had before.

I did see Steve last night after my client dinner. He gave me a bottle of Lovely, Sarah Jessica Parker's new fragrance. It lives up to its name. There's something so sweet about getting perfume from your boyfriend, even if he did get it free from a friend who reps for the product.

On a completely different note, since this morning, I've had an old camp song stuck in my head. My sister Jennifer should remember it. We learned it when we were teenage camp counselors:

Today is Wednesday, it's a very good day.
Thank God for Wednesday, let's shout hooray. (Hooray!)
If it wasn't for Wednesday, what would we do?
Then we wouldn't have Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday,
All week long...together with you!
It's gotta be Wednesday, it's gotta be Wednesday,
Is it Wednesday yet? You bet!

Each day at camp started off with this song, substituting the appropriate day of the week. What a great way to kick off the day. The kids liked it anyway!

Painting

Steve and I spent the weekend painting. He's renovating his house, getting it ready to sell hopefully this Spring, and several rooms need painting. We finished two bedrooms, the hallway, 9 doors and all the edging. His friend Cris helped us on Saturday, and we finished it up on Sunday. It was fun, working together. We turned on the radio, and since the old carpet has been pulled up, we didn't have to worry about little splashes and spray. It's so satisfying to see the rooms go from dingy and beat up to fresh white and clean.

To thank me for my cooperation, Steve cooked me a steak dinner on his grill. It was delicious. He also made me a German cucumber salad. One of the nicest things was being served, having someone make dinner especially for me!

Other than that, I haven't had many ideas for blogging...sorry for the void.

Relationship Homework

I got a voicemail message from a friend today asking for an update on Steve. I guess I've been hesitant to post anything because 1)not many of you commented to my New Year post about giving it another go, and 2)I didn't want to jinx it.

Besides, who wants to hear I'm happy? How entertaining is that?

(I think I was a more witty blogger when I had a more tumultous dating life, but oh well!)

Things are going swimmingly, wonderfully well. Last week, he even went with me to see my counselor Jo. (Bonus points for Steve!) Jo helped us see some similarities in our family histories and gave us "relationship homework" to help us discuss our values and communication styles. (We haven't finished it yet.) The visit with her was REALLY interesting, and Steve and I agreed it was actually fun. It's so great to be in a relationship where I can really be honest with him about how I feel and when I'm scared. And Steve has been very supportive, understanding and flexible. He's allowing me the space I need to be myself.

How Weird am I?

The latest meme from my sister Jenn, 5 weird things about me: (meme=a cultural unit (an idea or value or pattern of behavior) that is passed from one generation to another by nongenetic means (as by imitation); "memes are the cultural counterpart of genes")

1. The toenails on my big toes have been stunted from multiple ingrown toenail surgery and the anti-growth stuff they put on them. They look strange. I often get asked (if and when I show my bare feet) what happened to them.

2. I have a lot of flat moles all over my body. I used to think when I was little that if someone could connect all the dots, it would give me the answer to my purpose in life or something. There were four on my back like the points of a cross, but one had to be removed under suspicion (it was fine).

3. I have a pet peeve about loose hair in the sink. Even if I'm at a public bathroom or at work, I must rinse the hair down the drain.

4. I have never tried illegal drugs of any kind, not even marijuana. Many people of my generation find that surprising, but I've never really been interested.

5. I like even numbers better than odd numbers, and therefore, I like even-numbered years better. In even-numbered years, my age is even-numbered. Logically, I know there's probably nothing to it, but here's a thought: both of my failed marriages started in odd-numbered years...

New Year Musings

I've been off the blog scene lately. I didn't even read my sisters' blogs for the past couple days. I had a nightmare last night that something had happened and I didn't know about it, so I caught up on all their pictures and stories this morning.

I took Friday off as my last vacation day of 2005, and today is a holiday from work. It's been great to have a 4-day weekend to catch up on everything: sleep, laundry, cleaning, and visiting with friends.

The antibiotics are doing their job, and I'm finally feeling more like myself. Thanks for everyone's well-wishes! But now that I'm feeling better physically, I seem to be dwelling more on my emotional status.

I know I have a tendency to over-analyze, but...
Sometimes I run when things get too tough. Moving around often as a kid was great in so many ways, but it taught me I can start over and not deal with relationship issues. I know that each of my brief marriages was doomed from the start (poor choices on my part), but still I wonder if I didn't give it enough effort? Then I remember the situations and think, yes I did...

I also vacillate between feeling really confident and thinking I deserve someone who loves and appreciates all my unique qualities and feeling not good enough. I've discovered (through in-depth counseling with a insightful professional) that I tend to be the pursuer in relationships. I feel more comfortable with the role of trying to win someone over. When I "get" them, I start to feel restless. (I think that's when the feeling of "I'm not good enough" comes in.)

I have also been exploring and trying to chip away at my unattainable goal of perfection. I know logically I'm not perfect and can never be, but sometimes my drive to be perfect in every facet of my life comes out and nearly cripples me. I also tend to look for perfection in a man...something we all know doesn't exist! (ha ha)

Steve wrote me a beautiful and heartfelt email over the holidays. I broke up with him after he made a stupid mistake, and I focused on that and not the months of his true behavior. He had also recently told me he loved me. That scared me (see above), and I didn't react well to it. Even before the email and our recent talks, I have felt that he has been the first man to truly see and appreciate me for who I am. And so, with all this in mind, I've decided to see him for lunch. No guarantees for anything else, but I need to explore this a bit more.

Hope all this rambling makes sense. Thanks for reading it!

Christmas in Review

It's so much fun having little ones around for Christmas. Their delight in the smallest wonders kept all the adults smiling.

Some of my favorite moments:

Colin: "I got a box!"
Anna: "I hope you feel better by Christmas, Auntie Emily."
Both: "The CLOCK! The CLOCK!" (Said each time Nana's clock would chime. Then they would count in unison each time it rang.)
Colin: "Em-wee!" as he ran toward me with open arms and gave me a tackling hug.
Decorating gingerbread cookies with Anna and Jennifer.
Colin putting chocolate fudge into his mouth with both hands before saying, "Moh Chocwat, pwease."

Unfortunately, I'm still under the weather. My annoying cold has turned into a sinus infection, and my doctor is on holiday! (I'm seeing her colleague tomorrow -- the soonest I could get in.) It's nice to be home, and Sabrina is VERY glad I'm back, but I do miss those sweet voices and all the hugs.

Twas the Night Before Christmas 

A sweet kiss from Colin O. 

Opening my first gift, from Anna, a feather and 2 acorns, wrapped in paper decorated by her. Colin is playing with his new motorcycle. 

Fun with Anna & Colin

Anna and I are sitting at Grandad's computer. Just finished catching up reading my sisters' blogs and my comments. Thanks for everyone's well-wishes. I am starting to feel better. Anna says she hopes I'm better for Christmas and asks me several times a day how many days it is until Christmas.

Colin has a cold, too, and he refuses to blow his nose. But he will let you wipe it. It's something, I guess.

Anna and I had quite a giggle-fest yesterday when I laid on the couch and Grandad's dog Patchie came and laid on my tummy. Every time I laughed, Patchie would bounce up and down. She didn't try to get off, just enjoyed the ride, which only made us laugh more.

Later, Patchie made a coughing noise that sounded like "Blech!" I imitated the noise to Anna and Colin's delight. Colin kept saying "Again!" I must have Blech-ed 100 times.

My Status

I thought I should write something...even though I don't feel much like writing...but I thought if anyone was checking the site, it would be nice for them to see a new post. And I don't want to lose my loyal audience...

I feel like crap. In addition to my emotional upheaval, I've got a nasty head cold. It started on Saturday and has only gotten worse. I've gone through probably hundreds of tissues and taking decongestants, Mucinex and lots of vitamin C. Just hoping the congestion in my ears clears out before I fly to El Paso on Thursday.

That's what I'm focusing on...seeing my parents, Jenn, Anth and the kids for Christmas. I've wrapped all the gifts and have already started packing. Hope all who are reading have a wonderful, magical Christmas and safe travels!

All Good Things Must Come to an End

Steve and I have decided not to see each other anymore. I don't want to go into details, but it takes awhile to get to know someone, and sometimes, along the way, you learn things about them that aren't compatible with you.

I'm bummed. We had some fun times, but I also think I've made the right decision. It's just sad when things come to an end.

Holiday Symbolism

I love all the holiday decor. Several houses on my street deck their doors, trees and bushes with lights, and I always put up my tree and a wreath on the door.

But what's the significance of the pink flamingo?

One of the houses down the street, in addition to it's red, green and white Christmas lights, has a pink flamingo in lights, complete with an orange beak.

Evergreen trees are meant to signify God's everlasting love, and lights are to signal that Christ has come as the light to the world. But the pink flamingo? I just don't know.

About Being Thirty-Something

What is it about being over thirty that your body begins a mutiny against its host?

I remember in college learning something about after 30 your body biologically starts to decline. Any growth is now over, and biologically speaking, it's all downhill.

Well, I know what's growing! Chinny hairs! (This is what my mom and sisters and I call the suspiciously wiry and unwanted hairs that spring from your chin at wild angles.)

I found another one this morning. I have a mole in the middle of my chin that, since puberty, has sprouted obvious dark hairs. I tried getting the mole removed when I was 17, and although the mole got lighter and less noticeable, the hairs continued to emerge at regular intervals. Some are now gray -- I don't think this is due to my age. I think I have sped up the aging of those hair follicles by plucking them.

So I continuously check the mole on my chin for new growth. This morning, in addition to the new dark hair from the ever-producing mole, I also had a longish blonde hair under my chin. What's with that?! I don't need that!

At least men get some, too. Their extra hair springs from their nose and ears. Maybe the chin isn't so bad compared to that.

Of course, I'm sure my mom and aunts will post comments about how much more fun I have to look forward to: menopause, the disappearance of collagen, moustaches...Can't wait!

The Ultimate in Selective Listening

Why do cats selectively understand what you're saying? It's freezing outside today (literally, it's been raining and sleeting and is below the freezing point), and my cat is sitting by the sliding glass door, meowing to be let out. I even opened the door wide enough for her to get out, and she could tell it was too cold. She didn't go through the open door, so after 30 seconds or so, I shut it.

That was only 10-15 minutes ago. It's not any warmer now, I promise!

Sabrina is 12, and she really does understand some human phrases, such as:
Want a treat?
Wanna go outside?
Don't even think about it!
Ready for bed?

I love her dearly, but today, since I'm working from home because of the inclement weather and the incompetent driving ability of most Texans, she's driving me crazy!

Ok, I give up. I'm letting her out so she can experience this cold for herself. I know she'll just come back in and complain to me (more meowing), apparently believing that I control the weather.

(She went out...lasted about 1.5 minutes.)

A Trip into the Past

One of the things Dallas is most known for, and the most shameful, is being the location for President John F. Kennedy's assassination. While I have driven past "the grassy knoll" on several occassions, I haven't visited the 6th Floor Museum at the Book Repository or taken the tour, until Monday night.

One of my clients was in town from Pittsburgh, and our evening activity was the tour. The museum is very well done, with many visuals, artifacts from the time period, audio and video. You can walk through at your own pace and experience any and all of these.

What I took away from the exhibit was a real sense of the sadness felt by the country and around the world when Kennedy's life was ended in such an unexpected and early time. The museum did a nice job of capturing that time in history -- the segregation, the Civil Rights movement, the fear of communism -- and Kennedy's idealism. I wish we had more of the sense of personal responsibility that he instilled in the generation of young people at that time: "Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country."

Happy Holidays! (Enjoying the festivities at my company party) 

Entertainment x 3

Although I flew back into town early Friday morning and we had planned a quiet evening, Steve got free symphony tickets for Friday evening, and we just couldn't pass it up. We had a quick Italian dinner and headed downtown. The symphony was hosting a talented young violinist as a guest soloist. She is just 17, but her talent and dedication were obvious. She was so expressive and obviously felt and loved the music she was playing. I enjoyed watching her and seeing both the child and the young woman in her expressions.

On Saturday night, we had both Steve’s and my company parties. His was held in a suite at the Mavericks’ game. Mine was held downtown, a “Monte Carlo” night with a karaoke room. We had so much fun at both…Sunday was spent recovering!

What I've Been Up To

Sorry I haven't posted since the Thanksgiving review. Monday was a whirlwind day back at the office, and I learned I would be in Chicago Tuesday and Wednesday. I already had plane tickets to Houston on Wednesday for Thursday's tea, so today is only my second day in the office this week!

Chicago was SO cold! When I got there, it was in the 30's with a bitter wind. There were a few snow flurries, but nothing on the ground. My two days of meetings went well, and Wednesday I headed to Houston, where it was a balmy 65-70.

The twins were so excited to see "Auntie Eminee!" I got lots of great hugs and kisses. Steph gave me a glass of wine, and Graham asked so sweetly for a sip, I couldn't refuse. He had a taste and replied, "Mmm! Yummy in my tummy!"

On Thursday, my mom, aunt Cinda, cousin Bevie and Steph's sister-in-law Gwynn and niece Lauren arrived. It was girl time! The twins suddenly had lots of family around to love on and play with. Once they went down for their afternoon nap, we all gathered in Stephanie's ample bathroom to get ready. Stephanie graciously fixed Bevie's, Lauren's, mom's and my hair! She's very stylish and has quite a way with hair accoutrements. We joked that she missed her calling as a hair stylist!

The tea was lovely. Held at the country club, everything was festively decorated, and there was plenty of delicious finger sandwiches, desserts and champagne. Everyone looked their finest. (Sorry I have no pictures to share. I forgot my camera, but I highjacked Steph's and took several photos.) We all commented that Jennifer was missed. The good doctor had patients to care for...

Now, it's back to reality. Crazy deadlines, clients calling to make changes at the last minute, and more work than can possibly get done in a day. (And I'm blogging. Well, I needed a break!)